Updated: Apr 7, 2020
My journey through infertility actually started long before I even thought about having kids. I was 18. I was not on birth control or sexually active. However, the year I graduated from high school and started college, I realized that I had gone 9 months without having a period.
Through all of that, it seemed like doctors didn't always take me seriously. The gynaecologist I went to first told me I had "a hormone imbalance" and didn't really care to explain the cause or any possible complications or anything more than that label. I knew enough to know that a diagnosis should be more specific, which is why I switched to an endocrinologist. He wasn't an RE, but he was pretty much the only doctor to believe my symptoms and thoroughly test and explain everything. Through the years when I changed doctors and told them about my diagnosis, they always seemed to be skeptical, and I would get comments like "Just because somebody told you you have PCOS..." and "If we thought there was a problem, we would definitely treat it." More than one doctor has asked me to describe the tests previous doctors did, as if they didn't trust the other doctors to do it "right" or maybe they thought I'd googled my symptoms and diagnosed myself. It all came very condescending.
While I was trying to conceive and dealing with the frustration and fear of that process, it helped to talk about it with people who understood. Every time I found someone who was going through a similar ordeal, I wanted to tell them everything. Sometimes people who haven't experienced infertility don't know how it feels or what to say, so it''s scary to talk to them. When people understand, it's easier, and it helps lighten your emotional load. Exercising and eating healthily helped too, because it was something I could control that would also help me in getting pregnant. Plus it helps relieve stress in and of itself.
All in all, I would tell anyone going through this journey, that it's ok to talk about it. It's ok to take breaks. It's ok to change your path in the middle of it.
Written by Kelli Chamblee